More than Forever

Allow me to recount my past love only this time. Not out of bitterness, but as a testimony of how God loved me.

I have been told six years ago, by the person whom I called my great love then that I am not worth a marriage. He didn't love me enough to make it to forever. My 21 year old self was shattered. Eventually, I found out that Forever, to that boy, is his ex-girlfriend. And he loved me less than forever.

Back then, I was still re-establishing my relationship with the Creator. I have been crying out loud to Him always of the pains and the injustice my love life has given me to the point of questioning Him of His plans for me. Despite my being stubborn,  He has never failed to sustain me. He made me whole again.

When I learned to surrender, I prayed for Him to give me a man after His heart in His perfect timing. I prayed for a guy to love me more than forever as I prayed to be the woman worth that love. I prayed for healing too and of course the grace to forgive myself and the boy who broke my heart.

Today, I am God's testimony of His faithfulness. In a year's time, I will marry the man He has prepared for me. Amazing. I am overwhelmed with the mixed of emotions I am feeling all at the same time. One year to go and I will be a Mrs. The wait may seem long, but I am taking the remaining days of being single, to preparing myself for the new role God has entrusted me. Thank You Lord for my more than Forever. You rock.

 

Because today is P's birthday.

09.07.08 First time to celebrate Papol's birthday as a couple.

Celebrating birthdays across the miles--one of the many firsts that Pol and I will be doing since I decided to work here in the Middle East.  Long distance relationship is sweet and difficult at the same time.

I remember Pol telling me weeks before my departure, "Pag andun ka na ha, wag mo ko masyado aawayin, kasi hindi kita mapupuntahan." Haha! Ok, fine. When Pol and I argue then, mostly because my topak ako, Pol though most of the times apprehensive, will show up (either alone or may back up na kaibigan), and I knew right then just by seeing him that things are okay. Kahit kunwari galit pa rin ako.

If you have been to my father's Eulogy last April, I mentioned that growing up despite of being surrounded by LDRs (Papa is an OFW and my sister has an ongoing long distance relationship for 11 years now), I was firm in believing that LDRs don't work.

But I was converted.

It's true what they say, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder." Being away from the boyfriend is like growing up again. I have to unlearn so many things, mostly those I love doing with Pol -- eating, coffee, tambay and of course serving together in Singles for Christ. Also, it gave me so much wider perspective on why I am so blessed to have him in my life.

We're not really showy, and we try to be not so mushy. We call each other Pakners even, na parang tropa lang.  But to us it's deeper than the casual tone to it. We are truly partners in many ways, because no matter how we deny it, we do things best together.

At dahil birthday nya, ilalabas ko na ang video scandal ko... Bwaahaha.. Kakuntsaba ang SFC-SCOM, at mga colleagues ko sa IAID Qatar (our vocal/keyboards Instructor Ms. Hazel, and our Events Officer, Ms. Shiela)...Salamat po sa mga accomplices.

Eto talaga yung pinlay sa The Voice SFC Laguna audition last 1st September. Video sya, hindi mp3... nagkamali lang daw yung nagpasimuno. :P

Happy birthday Polito!!!

Coz Pol you're amazing, just the way you are. Ang nagagawa nga naman ng pag-ibig. hahahaha.

The effort paid off seeing this video recording his reaction, :P

To POL: Seeing this video made me miss you so much. :) TNL na TNL sa pagpigil ng luha ha. (Tunay na lalaki). 7th September has always been a very special day for me spiritually since 2006. Pero hindi ko akalain na magiging mas special pa pala ito kasi ito rin pala ang araw na ipinanganak ang ultimate gift ni God sa kin. To my Pakner, my Sweetie, my 4G and now my fiance, have a blast today! I can't wait to be Mrs. Bermudez soon. God bless you more.

Meet Pucca!

Late posting, but this is worth a slot in my journal.

P gave me this baby last March. I'm like, what is this? But then again, it's the thought that counts right?! So meet Pucca, our baby! :) I guess this is his subtle way of reminding me to wear a smile always.

I love my P's! :)

My prince, my love.

Dear Girlfriend,

While I can tell you to find a man who is handsome, extravagant, good with words, and romantic, I tell you now that you can have everything when you choose to be with a man of God. For the day will come when you are no longer in the honeymoon stage,  good looks will eventually fade and the weight keeps kicking in. The sweet words will be overused, and the luxuries will pass by. The man of God knows perfectly that you are a precious gift from God. And so he will take care of you like how God wants you to be treated. That man will know that the a love triangle is necessary: you, him, and your Creator. And if both of you will delight Him first, He will shower you with the desires of your hearts. Nothing can beat the storms of blessings in store for you.

I prayed for a man like that some years ago and God answered my prayers.

***

To my prince,

Thank you for treating me like the Princess God said that I am since day 1. Thank you for always reminding me that I am precious.

Thank you for always being the calm sea.

Thank you for making me smile, even if it's difficult. For telling me to "turn my frown upside down." And for stretching my curled eyebrows all the time.

For being my mission and service partner. For rising up to the challenge of  "walking the talk especially in Singles for Christ." For restoring my faith in the brothers of SFC.

For loving me in all of my shapes and forms.

May 2008

August 2008

December 2008

May 2010

June 2011

February 2012

For being a man of action and prayer.

For always replying "Let's pray" when I initiate a fight. :P

For simply being my frog Prince!

For believing that our relationship will be perfected in God's love.

Thank you for reminding me to just love my neighbors without expectations. For reminding me to "kill everyone with kindness." Thank you for being a living example of SFC-CLP talk 6, a walking proof of 1st Cor. 13

And hang on sweetie, God is still not done with me. I'm working on it. :)

Happy four years! I'm so blessed to have you. Thank God for you.

***

Sister, keep on praying because God answers prayers.Wait patiently and remain faithful as you wait. :)

May we all be continuously blessed.