I have a fear on death. One of my own (apparently called Tanathophobia). I dreamt about my death a lot of times. In my dreams I was being buried and I could even feel myself rotting. Horrible. And then I fear losing people through death as well. When my father died last year, the concept of death became more real. People know for sure that there is no way to escape death, but few people really have a clear grasp of it. Today's celebration of All Soul's Day is fitting. I have reasons to be sentimental.
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| "Death is the only destination we all share." - Steve Jobs |
Steve Jobs once said, "Death is the only destination we all share." How true. And unless one has a close encounter with death, one can never really relate to how it really is. No words can comfort a broken heart. No flowers can replace the empty void left by that person. And even if they say time heals all wounds, it does not (at least for me). It could be that I am just impatient, as always.
When I think about it, there is more to death that I fear. It is a web of my insecurities, my vulnerabilities: the fear of being left behind, fear of being lost somewhere, fear of uncertainty, fear of being forgotten.
I can go on about my premature questions on heaven, hell and the in betweens, or even my thoughts on where our ultimate destination would be after this short stint on earth. But since I developed a relationship with Christ, I felt somehow that all of these are philosophical let alone insignificant. All I know now is that, since I accepted Christ in my life and has convicted myself to be with Him, I have never felt alone. When I lost Papa, it was Him who sustained me and my family. And even though I still fear dying, I strive to live a life that is pleasing to Him, so that I can join Him in the after life. Strive is the operative word. Pakahirap naman talaga kasing panindigan ang desisyong mabuhay para kay Kristo. Tall order. Extra challenge.
To talk about life as we commemorate the dead might be ironic. But it is in death that I have felt the urge to live my life fully according to how He wills it to be. By being reminded that my stay here is timed, (no matter how scary it is) I am challenged to seize every moment righteously. And in times that I fail to do so, I pray that I get to wake up another day to make amends.
Life and death offers so much of lessons despite the dichotomies. In the end, I hope to still have the best both worlds can offer.
Allow me to share this song from Jeremy Camp titled "There will be a day." May this inspire us to live life to fullest (despite of...) so we can look forward to the life that awaits after.
PS. I hope we took the time today to say a short prayer for the souls of our deceased loved ones. :)When I think about it, there is more to death that I fear. It is a web of my insecurities, my vulnerabilities: the fear of being left behind, fear of being lost somewhere, fear of uncertainty, fear of being forgotten.
I can go on about my premature questions on heaven, hell and the in betweens, or even my thoughts on where our ultimate destination would be after this short stint on earth. But since I developed a relationship with Christ, I felt somehow that all of these are philosophical let alone insignificant. All I know now is that, since I accepted Christ in my life and has convicted myself to be with Him, I have never felt alone. When I lost Papa, it was Him who sustained me and my family. And even though I still fear dying, I strive to live a life that is pleasing to Him, so that I can join Him in the after life. Strive is the operative word. Pakahirap naman talaga kasing panindigan ang desisyong mabuhay para kay Kristo. Tall order. Extra challenge.
To talk about life as we commemorate the dead might be ironic. But it is in death that I have felt the urge to live my life fully according to how He wills it to be. By being reminded that my stay here is timed, (no matter how scary it is) I am challenged to seize every moment righteously. And in times that I fail to do so, I pray that I get to wake up another day to make amends.
Life and death offers so much of lessons despite the dichotomies. In the end, I hope to still have the best both worlds can offer.
Allow me to share this song from Jeremy Camp titled "There will be a day." May this inspire us to live life to fullest (despite of...) so we can look forward to the life that awaits after.
"There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to You always." - Jeremy Camp
