Welcoming 2012 with an expectant faith.

From today's mass I learned that "Faith is the anecdote of Fear."

I used to be the girl who is anxious about everything else. Always the girl who wants to be in control. But over and over again, God showed me that He has a better way, a better plan, a future full of hope. While I learned to persevere and pray harder for the desires of my heart, I also learned to surrender. The day I learned to surrender is the biggest achievement for me.

2011 has been a roller coaster ride of emotions. I've got a handful of lessons from all the experiences. Will always be thankful to God for being with me all the way.

2011 is the year when...

I lost people dear to me. To Tito Del and Sister Rhia, your passing on brought new life lessons to me. I am sure you are happy with Papa God already. The family has been sickly this year, and so we resolve to cherish life and live healthier for 2012.

Dreams came true. I stared dreaming about my own business three years ago. It came almost full circle this year. I also dreamt of attending grad school, and yes, this year God finally gave His go signal. For SFC service, I once dreamt of serving in the International Conference. Hooray for being able to serve in the 18th Conference. Ibang level sobra. Thank you for that opportunity Lord. Hmm, next dream, giving a talk in a conference. Bwahaha. Why not? Dream bigger dapat! :P

I finished God's assignment to me. I have been SCOM head for almost three years. This year, I prayed that God gives the events team a new leader. One that can be an instrument of His love, through events. One that is unselfish enough to share a piece of herself, to the team she will be handling, and the rest of SFC Laguna. While letting go of what has been my routine, and the team whom I learned to love so muchie, I know that it is already time for other people to experience the joy of serving God extra mile.

I realized that going abroad is not yet for me. Everything I have is here. No need to look for elsewhere yet.

I learned how to truly love unconditionally through my 4G. Papol, thank you for everything. How could I ever thank God for you?

I learned to value money and use it wisely. More financial stewardship for me this 2012, so help me God.

Wow... I'm really blessed! Whatever you have for me this year Lord God, may I be able to glorify You, in all that I do.

Here's hoping for only the best that God planned for me! :)

May you be blessed too.

For God can read a poker face.

So you raise your hand very high in worship.
Cry your heart out in praise.
Speak of God's mercies and deliver God's message.
You boast of missions accomplished, areas conquered, souls led.
Yet outside of the comfort zone, and the eyes of those who watch
You are just another name, with a fake smile, covering dirty acts.
Your perfume cannot hide the real  aroma

Of a despicable soul that is you.

For no matter how high you hold up your hand,

or how loud you raise your voice in praise

God always sees a genuine heart

         and reads a poker face.

On happiness and peace of mind

On June 2008, someone very close to my heart asked me what happiness and peace of mind is. During that time, I was mourning, grieving for losing the love of my life (or so I thought). Yet very clearly I recall answering him without a blink of an eye.

And since it was the age of technology, everything transpired via email. I happened to retrieve this from my Inbox.

Happiness is raising my hand, singing my heart out, and crying that overwhelmed cry, when I am one with God in worship.

Happiness is seeing Mama and Papa, making lambing, as if Candy and I were not around.

Happiness is being in the arms of the person I loved most.

Happiness is being with my brothers and sisters in SFC, the one who knows my beautiful and ugly side, yet loves me for me.

The thin line...

Peace of mind, is making the most painful and difficult decision yet sleeping beautifully at night, knowing that you made the right one.

Peace of mind is the security that you are loved, head to foot, no buts, no ifs, just you.

Happiness is the state of knowing that you did what is just and right, to the best of your capability.

Happiness is bliss from following your heart.

Love is the two, and all the other fruits of love combined, with the person who will love me more than forever.

Amen. :)


Gosh, I can't believe I wrote that almost three years ago, during the most painful part of my life. I feel the words stronger now more than ever. I thank the Holy Spirit for the wisdom to not only write it down, but believe the spirit of those letters.

May we all find our own true happiness ad peace of mind.