Coincidence? Maybe not.

Every time a guy comes into my life, my ex would suddenly pop up from
nothingness. Weird? I thought so too. I mean, we are definitely
friends, but we don’t have the luxury of time to really check on each
other’s lives, except for the occasional hellos.

When
a “prospect” expresses a sudden interest on me, my ex would text me
(out of I dunno what?!) and tells me he misses me. Or say, I’m talking
to this guy I’m crushing on, and my ex would suddenly miss call me,
endlessly. Oh, I could go on with more incidence of those kinds but
that’s what I’d want to share with you for now.*sulk*

Well,
nothing’s really wrong with that since we’re best friends then even
before we got together. But could it be, and I’m really cautious about
this, a sign that I’m not suppose to go out with anyone co’z maybe,
just maybe, it’s really “us”? Or could it be pure coincidence
distracting me from my future? Well, the fact that I’m dwelling on this
too much means I’m  paranoid. So don’t mind me. I guess it’s a
case of boredom-Im-all-alone-and-its-so-hot thing that is incurable
especially these past few days. OMG! I need help.

Curly Tops

I have decided to wear my hair curly for this week. I don’t know, but I think that once in a while, we need to do something different, and that something might as well makes us feel good about ourselves.

It definitely did magic to me…

***
Back to the future.

At least three people for the past month alone asked about my future, like the career I would pursue or how I see myself in 5 to 10 years.

Well, if you’ve been asked the same question and your answer is a blank stare or a mumble of incomprehensible sentences, be afraid. Be very afraid.

Like me.

Well, if it weren’t for my mom’s incessant lecture this morning about how I should prepare my future as early as today, and this enlightening conversation with a friend, I couldn’t care less. I have plans. I want to get that coveted UP diploma, find work, and be a woman at the top of my career. Kinda vague. I know.

You know how things come to you when you’ve got nothing to do and is left in the four corners of your room, lying on your bed, staring at nothing—well, that happened to me. It hit me. I am totally clueless. C’mon, having a diploma isn’t everything. It’s hard enough to find a decent job for millions of graduating students of my batch, but it’s even harder to really plan how I would wrestle my way out of this complex life so I could live it the way I want to.

I wish it hit me harder though. Co’z I’m still here inside my room, reading this book that has been with me for 5 months now, while wondering, yes wondering of what lies ahead of me.

Bummer. I’m still inactive.

The bigger question of course is whether we should plan our future for us or live each day, as fate would’ve wanted it to be.

At the very least, I know my answer, a sincere one at that.

Do you?